age...

Nurse: How old are you?
Patient: None of your business.
Nurse: But the doctor must know your age for his records.
Patient: Well, first, multiply twenty by two, then add ten. Got that?
Nurse: Yes. Fifty.
Patient: All right, now subtract fifty, and tell me, what do you get?
Nurse: Zero.
Patient: Right. And that's exactly the chance of me telling you my age

electricity in india

If Electricity goes in America they call at power house.
In Japan, they test the fuse,

But in India , they check the neighbour's house ,"Sabki gayi hai naa , phir theek hai"=))=D

SQL query for wedding...

CREATE PROCEDURE MyMarriage
BrideGroom Male (25),
Bride Female(20) AS

BEGIN

SELECT Bride FROM india_ Brides
WHERE FatherInLaw = 'Millionaire' AND Count(Car) > 10 AND
HouseStatus = 'ThreeStoreyed'
AND BrideEduStatus IN (B.TECH ,BE ,Degree ,MCA ,MiBA) AND Having
Brothers = Null AND Sisters = Null

SELECT Gold, Cash, Car, BankBalance FROM FatherInLaw UPDATE MyBankAccout SET MyBal = MyBal + FatherInLawBal UPDATE MyLocker SET MyLockerContents = MyLockerContents + FatherInLawGold INSERT INTO MyCarShed VALUES ('BMW') END GO

Then the Bride writes the below query:

DROP HUSBAND;
Commit;

B.Tech and Engineers...

Statement of boys, when they remain unsuccessful in making girlfriends in College...

1st semester: Meri to pehle se hai...

2nd semester: Chalo try karenge

3rd semester: Apne batch me koi dhang ki nahi hai

4th semester: Juniors bhi dhang ki nahi hai

5th semester: Bhai kisise intro. to kara...

6th semester: Koi bhi chalegi...

7th semester: Mere paas time nahi tha varna...

And Finally

With Full Attitude

8th sem: Dekha puri degree ho gayi paraaj tak kisiko bhaav nahi diya...D

Santa gr888

Once a Hindu, a Muslim and our dear Santa Singh were standing together. An Englishman came up and asked, “Hey guys, what is your favorite flower? ”
The Hindu replied, ‘Lotus’ ‘Ha, I wipe my shit with that! ’ the Englishman jeered.
The Hindu got angry, the lotus being our national flower.
The Muslim replied: “Chameli” ‘Ha I wipe my shit with that! ’ The Englishman response
The Muslim also got angry but kept quite.
The Englishman asked Santa, ‘Sardarji, and what is your favorite flower? ’ Patriotic Santa replied: ‘Cactus! and replied, “Now wipe your whatever you want with that! ”

Royal Stag...

Train...girl...boy...

Girl (in train) :- can i sit here ?

Boy :- it all urs

Girl :- can i take some water ?

Boy :- my pleasure :)

Girl :- Bhaiya agla station kaun sa hai ?

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Boy :- mere baap ne mere dimag me koi GPS fit nhi kiya hai :@,
jaldi seat khali ker mujhe neend aa rahi hai..!!

work must be completed...

A fellow stopped at a rural gas station, filled his tank, and took a break by his car while drinking a soda.

As he relaxed, he watched a couple of men working along the roadside. One man would dig a hole two or three feet deep and then move on. The other man came along behind him and filled in the hole.

The men worked right past the man and continued on down the road.

Overcome by curiosity, the fellow headed in their direction. "Hey there," he said. "Can you tell me what's going on here with this digging?"

"We work for the county government," one of them said.

"But one of you is digging a hole and the other is filling it up. What's up with that?" the man asked.

"Well," the worker replied, "normally there's three of us - me, Rodney, and Mike. I dig the hole, Rodney sticks in the tree, and Mike here puts the dirt back, but Rodney's out sick."

"So what does the work you're doing accomplish?" asked the man, not quite believing what he was seeing.

"Well," Mike said. "Just because Rodney's out sick, that don't mean we can't work, right?"

not this time...ha ha ha

A middle-aged couple, with two beautiful daughters, decided to try one last time for the son they always wanted.

Soon, the wife became pregnant, and, nine months later, delivered a baby boy.

The joyful father rushed to the nursery to see his new son, but was horrified to find an incredibly-ugly baby.

He went to his wife and said, "I cannot possibly be the father of that hideous child. Look at the two beautiful daughters I fathered."

When his wife blushed, he became suspicious, and demanded, "Have you been fooling around on me?"

His wife confessed, "Not this time."

every1 change, but friends never change...

Dangerous Dosti...

.Main ghar late aaya to Dad ne poochha:"kaha the janab?".
Maine kaha: "Friend ke ghar tha..."
Dad ne mere hi saamne mere 10 friends ko call ki?.

4 ne kaha: "Haan Uncle, yahin par tha...";).

2 ne kaha: "Abhi just nikla hai...":-|.

3 ne kaha:

"Yahin hai Uncle, parh raha hai, phone dun kya?":p.

1 kamine ne toh hadd hi kar di,

kaha: "Haan Papa bolo kya hua...!!!":O

Dost zindabaad!!!!!!

HahHahhahah :D